Midwives and Grandparents

I met with Midwives in Memphis about a home birth.

Vince wasn’t able to go because of work so I took my mother, which turned out to be great since she really liked them and they reassured her about the homebirth and safety.

Before we went to the meeting, we had been at my grandparent’s house visiting them and my Great-Aunt Robbie, who is in town. They all had lots of questions, which I can understand. Grandpat was being his usual grumpy self and asking questions out of concern but making comments about the midwives. I assured him over and over this would be safe and better for the baby and me. I must point out my mother was their only child and I am her only child and this is their first great-grandchild so they are very protective of me and this baby. I think I started to make him understand things and then as we are leaving he starts to say something about midwives again, but I cut him off asking him “where you born in a hospital?”

“… Well no!” he said and started laughing.

Needless to say when we got back and told them about the visit he was also on board with a homebirth.

I want to take a minute to brag about how nice and reassuring the midwives were. They are so warm and caring and informative. My mother had to ask what some would call “stupid” questions, but she never gave birth so she honestly didn’t know. They answered her kindly and when we explained, I was adopted and she never gave birth, they understood and started explaining everything about birth so we would know what was going to happen. One midwife has an adopted daughter from China and she says that was her most difficult “labor,” that my mother understood perfectly well.

They made a comment that now clients are starting to be closer to the age of their children, so now they are more like mothers to the clients not friends. I think both my mom and I need someone like them to get us through this.

My mother wasn’t the only one that asked “stupid” questions though. After my experience with my first doctor I realized I had to ask if things were routine, like checking the heartbeat each visit and informing me what they were testing me for. They were at first puzzled until I explained my doctor didn’t listen for the heartbeat and I hadn’t heard the heartbeat since I was 7.5 weeks (that was 7.5 weeks ago). They thought that was very odd and when Mama asked if they could let us hear it, they were so sweet and we got a recording of it.

Baby is very wiggly it seems because after a few seconds in one place it would move and the midwife would have to find it again. I'm not too surprised I never stopped moving as a kid so I figured my kid would be the same.

And my mother cried when she heard the heartbeat. But I didn’t judge because hearing it makes me want to cry and rejoice and I don’t know which to do first.

We are so blessed and relieved to have the team of midwives join us in this journey.